Talk:Brian's Work in Progress

Brian's Work in Progress

Title: Goid na Beatha do Fhuinneamh (Theft of Life Energy)

Bruce's Opinion: Ok, I am going to admit right now that I don't fully understand whether this is supposed to be Thaumaturgy or Necromancy. The style says Thaumaturgy, but the effect is very necromantic, so much so that it appears to duplicate of a necromancy spell, one that you have Brian -- Blades of Thanatos. The thing that is weird about this is that you have increased the level to five, making casting harder and the ritual only gives you seven of the victim's health levels. So what gives, why do it this way??

The description begins quite well, but then suggests that it is hard to take advantage of lost life-force on the battle field, which you seem to do very well. At which point you begin talking about elemental forces, which doesn't seem to go with the theme of your ritual. Your ritual is meant to steal life-force more effectively than Blades of Thanatos correct?

Your sacrifice looks fine, maybe a touch too specific, lets face it, human sacrifice is considered one of the most potent sacrifices around. So why make the type of person to be sacrificed so specific, it doesn't seem to be necessary for this type of enchantment?

On to the casting, so familiarity with your life-force stealing weapon is necessary to transfer that life-force to you, I can understand that. Regardless of whether it is Necromancy or Thaumaturgy the difficulty is way too low for the level of the ritual. You have also limited yourself on which nights the ritual can be cast, making the ritual very inconvenient if the enchanted weapon does its thing and then you have to wait a whole month or even part of one. The final part about the damage makes sense and is a nice detail.

Ok, Brian. I may not be very popular with you on this but, I think your trying to do something really unnecessary by making this a Thaumaturgic ritual. With necromancy, the ritual could be level five also and would be a permanent magical item. It wouldn't need re-enchanting and it would take your casting successes on the initial ritual from each opponent, each and strike. It would basically be a sword of life-stealing. There would probably be caveats about the blade having to take a life once drawn and that sacrifice would probably have to be human at the very least.

Please let me know if my commentary has been in any way useful and if you would like me to comment on your other rituals. And please understand that my commentary is entirely positive, at least in intent and I only wish to aid you in your goals. -- Bruce (06/16/2014 -- 18:32)

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reply to Bruce

I struggled with that, still not sure which it should be. The current weapon series is all Thaumaturgy, not sure if it would integrate well with a necromancy spell.

Remember this is adding to all the other weapons rituals, it is difficult because it must integrate with all the other ones. The number 7 came from total health levels that a person has, and since it piggie backs on the damage of the weapon if you only do 5 damage all 5 would give you health levels but you would not get 2 more. On the other side if you did 9 damage, they would still take 9 aggravated levels(assuming the weapon did agg) but caster would get 7 health levels back.

For the Sacrifice I wanted to have something that connected the life force of the victem being sacrificed directly back to the caster. It sets up and gives a channel for the permanent draw of life force directly to the caster.

This is a permanent enchantment so I didn't feel limited time frame was unweildy. for diff on the roll, I could make it 8, the 7 just went with everything else and seemed good.

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Title: Goid na Beatha do Fhuinneamh (Theft of Life Energy)

Most humans have 10 or 12 health levels, depending on the source: This is how much damage the body can take before it is completely oblitterated. This is somewhat different from how much damage the body can take before it is too damaged to sustain life: the 8th damage level kill. Some people (those with the Huge Size merit) have an extra one, and there are other ways to gain extra health levels (some advanced combat forms, True Berserk, etc).

Of course, it is life force that is of interest, particularly to a vampire, not physical health levels. Cutting a corpse in half to "steal" its remaining structural integrity shouldn't do anything. The blade should steal any health levels that move its victim closer to death (including the one that kills it) no matter how much damage it does.

As a master of both Necromancy and Thaumaturgy, I believe you can tailor your own rituals to work with one another no matter what school they come from (that is not to say that you can mix schools within one ritual). As a matter of research, you can make it do either, but it would be easier for you to effectively create a permanent Blade of Thanatos via necromancy rather than create a life-stealing blade via Thaumaturgy.

Comparing this ritual to Blades of Thanatos is instructive. It exceeds the rank 3 ritual in several ways: First, it is permanent: The blade is not destroyed in the act. Second, the amount of life it may steal is not limited by the number of successes on the casting roll, but only by the amount of damage it inflicts. Third, the ritual does not preclude further enchantment of the blade, allowing you to make the blade aggravated, quicker, etc. Fourth, you may use steel or any other material, not just bone.

Further review of Blades of Thanatos indicates that Blades is a particularly arduous low level ritual to cast. It must be cast three times, and the caster must sacrifice his own health each time. Whether this is comparable, as a sacrifice, to the life of an mortal foe (a mortal who attacked the caster) is debatable, but the caster's own health is certainly more valuable, "point for point" than that of an insignificant mortal whom the caster would rather died anyway. I wonder if some continuing sacrifice might be required. Wayland-Forged Blades require a monthly tithe, as do other powerful artifact weapons.

As a further cost, I believe that any permanent magical enchantment requires the expenditure of at least one point of willpower. In this case, that's pretty cheap, since you won't be casting this regularly on the way into combat.

In a way, it might benefit you to incorporate Necromantic rituals into the creation of your custom blades. You already rival the Damoscene and Wayland Marked Blades of legend. Figure out a form of celerity or precognition, and yours will be better. - and a life sucking ability may be arguably better than an extra action. Mixing your magics makes the feat nearly impossible to duplicate.

Anyway, I hope this helped. As with Bruce, I'm trying to be constructive and help your process along, not tell you that you are doing things wrong. In fact, I think that this ritual is far more "right" than "wrong." Like most things, it needs a little tweaking before being put into production.

-Jamie

Title: Ullmhacht Litrithe Cath Treoraí ar (Battle Mage's Spell Readiness)

As a permanent version of suspension of incantation (basically an Icon for path magic, I can see this. What I don't understand is why it requires multiples: Icon and suspension can both be activated as often as feasible. Suspension has a more flexible trigger, allowing it to be activated with or without the caster's intervention (targeting a dozen suspensions on the next person to open a particular door, or the next person at whom you point and say "die!" can be a nasty trick.) Given the previously existing work, using a single piece of jewelry with multiple gems to hold the magic is possible but not necessary.

Upon rereading, I see a couple of issues.

First, you use the phrase, "The magic is set with the casters will." (end of the casting section) Does this mean that the caster spends a point of willpower? To balance with other similar magics, it should require a willpower per spell stored.

Second, I think you are saying that activation can occur as a free action, and only when the caster specifically wills it to happen. Most triggered magic requires something - an action, a word, whatever - to set it off. Will might be allowable, but it is dangerous: stray thoughts might cause you to accidentally "fireball" someone who is mouthing off in Elysium. After all, wouldn't it be so much easier if they were facing you on the field of combat?

Third is the issue of balance. As you write it, this ritual is better than another of the same level, specifically Icon. It is better because it can hold a wider variety of magic, and it is cheaper in that you suggest it requires (maybe) only one willpower, whereas to store six magics permanently would require six willpower using Icon. Since no one has ever thought that Icon was underpowered for its level, I think these two factors push this ritual into the rank 6 range.

- Jamie

Title: Éadaí de ceo agus scáth (Clothing of Mist and Shadow)

It looks ok as is, though pretty limited.

- Jamie