Lord Blake's Personal Journal
Quote
"There’s no reflection when you look in the mirror"
"You’re out for blood and you can smell the fear"
"You need poison"
"Like it’s the only thing that keeps you alive"
"You hear voices"
"They just keep telling you, you need me tonight"
-- "Sick And Twisted Affair" - My Darkest Days
An Admonition
A note on my character's nature versus his nurturing and how reading these internal monologues is going to sound to people who will never be able to read them.
By nature, I have always kept the world at a distance, there are probably countless reasons for this, but the point is that even when I am affectionate, it is at a distance. This is simply who I am. I have never been a part of a coterie and it is unlike me to bond with any group in that way. I simply prefer to do things my way and that is the final consideration regardless how I might feel about my associates.
In the world of the undead, how one is nurtured and indoctrinated makes up about ninety percent of clan lore and such.
The Lasombra Antitribu are from their own perspective, the creme-dale-creme of Caine's Childer. That is the simple fact of the matter, even the effete Ventrue play the seneschal to the Lasombra's royal status. It is no one's fault, not everyone can be gifted with the rarest of vitae. I was ridiculously lucky and I will spend the rest of eternity proving to my sire, grand-sire and siblings that I deserve to be one of them, but I would not have it any other way.
That others envy me, hate me or both, is only to be expected as servants are often unaware of their status in the beginning. And while I may seem indulgent by Lasombra Antitribu standards, it is simply easier to indulge the menials in the beginning rather than stoop to their level and bicker with them, eventually they will fall into line with the right schooling.
This is simply how things are, and nothing is going to change this state of affairs, it is how Caine intended things to be, after all, we were the first to receive his dark gift.
Ut Memini
- Chapter 1 -- My Mortal Life -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 2 -- How I died the First time -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 3 -- The Mission to Milan -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 4 -- Toledo and the War of Shadows -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 5 -- New York and the Camarilla Reconquista -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 6 -- A Yankee Magister in Queen Anne's Court -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 7 -- Shadow Courier and Shadow Courtier -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 8 -- To Protect and Serve the Camarilla -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 9 -- The Betrayal of a Backwoods Bulgarian Voivode -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 10 -- Shacking-Up with a Gypsy Woman in the City of Wisdom -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 11 -- A Season in Greece, A Season in Hell -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 12 -- Istanbul the Queen of Cities -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 13 -- How Not to Hunt a Dead Anathema in London -- L.B.
- Chapter 13 -- L.B.
- Chapter 14 -- A Journey down the Road of the Abyss -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 15 -- The Crusade of Dreams -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 16 -- The Three Amigos -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 17 -- Early Retirement (2023 - 2028) -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 18 -- A New Beginning - Glasgow (2029) -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 19 -- Two Years in an English Suburban Limbo - Birmingham (2031) -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 20 -- Now War is Declared and Battle come Down - London (Autumn of 2031) -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 21 -- An Act of Public Expiation - Houston (Spring of 2032) -- B.E.Z
- Chapter 22 -- A Yorkshireman's War -- Autumn of 2032 to the Spring of 2033 -- L.B.
- Chapter 23 -- A Dagger in the Dark -- 2042 -- L.B.